Tuesday 31 January 2012

Tuesday 31.1.12

The last day of January. Christmas seems like a long time ago now. I think January always feels like the longest month ever! However, February tomorrow and that means my birthday next week, this year to be spent at LGI with Harry when he has to fast for his MBIG scan, where they fly radioactive fluid in from Germany, inject Harry with it, to make any neuroblastoma that may be in his bones glow! Obviously we are hoping for no glows as that means the cancer has gone from his bones! Harry has a bone narrow test this Friday and a kidney test, then next week tests tues, wed, thurs and then in fri 10th for an appointment with our consultant to find out if Harry can move towards having his tumour out or if he needs more chemo. Well obviously my birthday present will be the news that Harry can have his tumour out, as once put he is in remission and all further treatment are bolt Ons to secure that the neuroblastoma is blasted away forever!
If he needs more chemo then statistically overall survival rates are reduced, but statistics are only that! So we have to keep on hoping!
I have to admit the last few days have been the most difficult yet to get through and our stress levels have gone through the roof and tears never far away!
Part of the stress has not knowing what happens next, after each hospital admission so far we have had more chemo booked in, but not this time. We finally found out the plan late Monday. That is the tests described above and the date for D day being 10th feb.
Harry has been very tired and tearful over the weekend too. The ward have been extremely short staffed and not been able to answer our questions, so by Monday I was yearning to know the next steps!
I think having mum in hospital and not being able to visit her compounded everything. She was doing well sat, but then had her bandage taken off too early and her knee swelled to the size of a football, so only released from hospital Monday, as we were in the end too as the ward needed the bed!
Yesterday I think was the pinnacle of all things stressful as I attended a works meeting that ended up being of no use to me, however got the number for HR so have followed that up now. The icing on the cake though was having another car hit mine squarely on the rear, whilst I was stationary!
However, today having spent ages on the phone sorting my claim out, should all be rectified quickly!
Having visited my mum with Harry and Paul, I feel much better!
Control is something I clearly need to have, as the not knowing what is happening next is hard for me to deal with!
Harry is very tired, but has been much brighter today. This morning he was tearful and tired, but he won't relax and have a nap, but at least went to bed and chilled watching his portable DVD player!
So as tranquility is restored in the Buckley household for a bit, we can chill out a bit. Next week is going to be a very difficult week to get through due to all the tests, sedatives and anaesthetics and fastings Harry will have, but by the end of the next week, we will be enlightened to the next plan of action for Harry!

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