I am not sure if this gives a direct link, but if you google You Tube then search Run for Harry day ten, you should find it!
Andy Johnson from Paul's work decided last year to train to do 10 x 10 km runs and raise money for us to continue on our adventures with Harry. He has just completed the 10 consecutive runs, with others joining him for some or all if the runs.
Since Harry is so very poorly this will not happen, but we will use the money to have adventures with Callum this summer. It feels such a long time since we had real fun, because sometimes each day seems like a week.
Harry's drugs are being increased every couple of days and even though we have done that, we are not on top of his pain. He is having extra oral top ups, to combat the pain and consequential sickness the drugs create.
He is still trying to fight and won't stay in bed all day. He insists on getting up. He is incredibly week, but still has ideas even though he hasn't the strength to build the Lego, he can still direct!
The above you tube video has clips from footage we took last summer of our adventures and the last 4 minutes is dedicated to showing these.
I showed Callum the clips and was taken aback by him sobbing his heart out afterwards. He is beginning his journey of
Grief and loss. Watching the live footage of Harry hit him hard. He felt a real sense of loss and articulated that it upsets him that Harry does not play with him anymore, he does not let Callum kiss or hug him anymore, he does not let Callum get things for him anymore. Harry doesn't let us hug or kiss him much anymore either, due to it being too painful. I told Callum that it was ok to cry and get upset, as we get upset too and we wish that Harry could walk and do things like he used to. We need to support Callum too. I will also seek out support for Callum. Some people say he is only 4, but to equip Callum with the appropriate 'tools' to manage his grief will help him deal with future losses, it will help him continue on his own journey of growing up and hopefully help him survive as an adult. To not address such monumental changes in our family unit, will give him increased baggage for later in life. I hope we have the strength to support him and not wrap him up in cotton wool either as our only remaining son.
We have already started talking to Callum about the fact that Harry will not get better, to be able to go to places such as Digger Land. It's hard to know how to approach the subject of dying to a 4 year old, but he is aware that animals die.
Callum asked me the other day how long joey the hamster will live for. I said they usually live for about 2 years, so probably till Callum is 6. He asked me how long people live for and I said that it depended on whether they got poorly or not. We then talked about the difference between colds and more serious illnesses. I did sat that Harry was very poorly. Hopefully, drip feeding information to Callum will help a little, but none of us can truly prepare him or us for the infiniteness of death.
I have been given some books, so will look at these and then post the titles on here for your information.